I Love Koalas

“ I’d love to hold a koala. They sleep 22 hours a day, eat eucalyptus leaves and just hang out. I want to spend some time with that guy.”

Milo

Top of my things-to-do-in-Australia bucket list: take a goofy picture of me holding a koala like everyone else does. An Australian symbol, this aww-inducing marsupial will melt even the coldest heart. One of the cutest animals in the world, and cool as well. And very chill. Ah, I just love koalas! 

And so here it is – a small tribute to one of the world’s most iconic animal species that is on the verge of becoming extinct.

The week after the great bushfires in Australia’s Southeast. I wake up to the smell of fire in the air. For the second time in one week, smoke from the over 50 bushfires that are still burning in the area, is blowing into the Sydney area. The closest fire in Wollemi National Park, 100 km from my place, by now the size of almost 200.000 hectares. Or 130.000 football fields. Causing the trail in Bouddi National Park, where only a week ago I had my infamous run, to be closed. Leaving Sydney in a smoky haze, air quality plummeting to hazardous levels.

Teachers on duty wearing face masks, children kept inside for recess, outdoor physical activities cut back to a bare minimum. The bush keeps burning, people losing their houses, animals are dying. 

But amidst all the doom and gloom and haze, little glimmers of hope. The Year 3 class is putting on a Save the Koalas! Bake Sale. All proceeds going to the Port Macquarie Koala Hospital. A place looking after sick and injured koalas affected by the recent NSW bushfires. 

The numbers vary – depending on whom you believe. Between 350 and 1000 koalas have been killed by the latest bushfires. 80% of their habitat destroyed. Their status changing from the recent “vulnerable” to “in danger”or “on the brink of going functionally extinct’. A species disappearing slowly in front of your eyes. Deforestation and bushfires having destroyed their main nutrient source: the eucalyptus tree. A koala eats up to two pounds of leaves a day. At the same time it takes months for these trees to grow back after a fire, leaving the koalas with no suitable food source. They starve.

The kids raised almost $1000 with their bake sale – money that may go to projects like”Koala Ark” – a refuge for burnt koalas, or koala drinking stations. Amazing! Good on you!

So what? You may ask. What’s so special about the koala. All it does is eat and sleep. And they are actually not that cute. Can be quite vicious with their sharp teeth and claws. Their roar is terrifying. And they smell pretty bad, especially the male ones that have an overpowering musky odor from a gland on their chest they rub against everything to leave their mark. Almost makes me not want to hold one anymore. Australian icon or not.

Not every animal has an obvious service it provides for the ecosystem. The koala is a “eucalypt mower”, a nutrient provider to other animals and prey to a variety of carnivores. And it has some pretty neat features that I didn’t know about. It took my Year 1 animal presentations to teach me a thing or two about the koala.

Fun Fact 1

Koala bears are actually not bears. They just look like bears. They are marsupials. Pouch animals to carry their babies around. And if that’s not enough – the koala’s pouch is upside down! Not very practical it seems, considering the fact that they sit in trees all day. But, to keep the young one from falling out, they have super strong muscle, like a drawstring, to close that bag. And the baby knows to hold on for dear life – with their claws and mouth inside mommy’s pouch.

Fun Fact 2

Koalas only exist in the south-east of Australia. You can find them sitting high up in eucalyptus trees of the native bushland, usually perched between the forks of the tree’s branches. I only saw one at a Wildlife Park west of Sydney. So did John Travolta, by the way.

Fun Fact 3

The koala has a super tough butt, just like the wombat. Which comes in handy when you have to sit all day. A feature I wouldn’t mind having, especially during report card times like these. My very own built-in cushion. Very handy!

Fun Fact 4 

Koalas seem to have everything double. Two thumbs on each hand. Two toes on the back on each of their feet. Two vaginas. And a two headed penis. I’m not making this up – you go google it. That’s what I did – it’s not something you learn in Year 1 science. Apparently, koalas have a super tiny brain, though – the size of a walnut. And only one! Not two.

Fun Fact 5

They eat a kilo of eucalyptus leaves a day, which is pretty amazing, especially considering the fact that they are poisonous to most animals. What helps them is some kind of special digestive organ that detoxifies the chemicals in the leaves. Also very practical, thinking of my wine consumption these days.

Fun Fact 5

The koala gets its name from the aboriginal word koolah, meaning no drink. The koala usually gets all his water from the eucalyptus leaves. The recent drought, however, has left the leaves dry and the koalas thirsty. Koala drinking stations help them through heat waves and water shortages. (I could make an analogy here, but I won’t. Still, wouldn’t mind a drinking station at my place, but then my name isn’t “no drink”, is it?!)

Fun Fact 6

They sleep pretty much all day, up to 20 hours! Not because they are lazy or high, but simply to conserve energy, as the eucalyptus leaves do not provide very much nutrients (which makes me kind of wonder why they are eating them at all – poisonous and useless? Beats me. I guess they  smell nice – like cough drops.) A bit like the chicken schnitzel bun I order for lunch at school. You eat the whole thing, only to feel sleepy right after, because – let’s be honest – there isn’t too much goodness in that thing. Probably poisonous too – just like them leaves.

Not So Fun Fact 7

The Australian icon, the koala, could eventually lose the fight against climate change, habitat destruction, disease, cars…

So here is to bake sales and local heros and anybody and anything that raises awareness of the importance of protecting the koala and the environment. It takes a village.

I leave you with some pictures from The Hello Koala Sculpture Trail in Sydney, where 20 different sculptures hand painted by Australian artists, where exhibited throughout the city, showing the uniqueness of the little fellow, who’s mantra I swear by – especially during report cards times!!!